Jan. 10, 1944

Dearest honey,

It was nice hearing from you today though you gave me little or no encouragement about coming out there. Though you’re trying not to persuade me one way or the other I get the main drift that you don’t favor the idea much. I guess I might as well stay right here or be a slave so to speak to the “finer things of life”. Land, home, and security. In the first place I had every intention in keeping the land, house and still try to be secure and there with you. But if you think, (and from every description, I think you do,) that it can’t be done, then you’re probably right. However, a lot depends on how I make out here financially between now and the first week in Feb. Also I’m counting on what the Lowdermans might say, and your C.O. too. And I mustn’t forget my dear foreman. He’ll probably bite my head off when and if I ask him if there is a possibility of obtaining my job back when and if I return here. So I guess I’m still on the fence. More on the stay at home side I believe though.

From your letter you seem to be harboring a fear of losing me. Why? Anything I might have written, I didn’t mean it that way, God. I just thought it would be wonderful to be near you and if there was any way of figuring a way that I might, then I’ll try it. You’ll never lose me, unless you give me reason to and I think your too fine a character and we think too much of each other for that to ever happen. You know my life doesn’t depend on this more that I want to make, there are plenty more girls in the same predicament as I last all them say when I ask them what they’d do, “Where is your head, God, I’d go.” The idea is that your only I’ll and the thought of you being so near and yet so far antagonize me. If you were in Calif., Texas or some far off place the temptation wouldn’t be so great and I’d probably be able to cope with the idea better. But if I must now, I will too. It does seem foolish to give up such a good job and, take a chance on such a step. I’ll grant you that. But on the other hand it seems foolish, not to be with you when you’re only that far away. If I couldn’t get work and I could keep up things, then the idea is out of the question anyway. But we’ll see.

Well dear it’s getting late and I’m going to hit the hay P.D.Q. Be good and remember I love you dearly too. I’m not desperate as you call it and no ones going to get crack at me, don’t you worry.

All my love

Ruthie

Xxxxxx

!!!!!!