A.P.O. #350 P.M.
July
28th, 2nd Wed. Anniv.
My Dearest Wife,
Today is a
day that will always live in my heart Pheety,
yet it’s the saddest day I’ve ever had in my life because it’s our anniversary
and I have broken your heart. I just
received your answer of July 11th, yes I asked for it and now it’s
set me to thinking! Not so much
about your drinking, but because I realize I’ve made a great mistake. It hurt me deep to write that letter and now
you’re probably asking just why I did.
For one thing I’ve worried myself too much and when I’d go so long
without hearing from you, I worried that much more. My imagination began working on me. Along came your letter March 6th
where you made the remark that hurt me.
That set my imagination higher than a kite. Then I wrote that long letter of April 27th
full of imaginable things about the remark you made. Later I got a letter from you but no answer
about the remark. Then I got angry
because you ignored my question, I began to wonder why you didn’t want to
answer it. Finally my imagination got
the best of me and I was so angry that it drove me to write that letter. You’ll never know Margaret what it’s like to
worry as I have & have your imagination working on you all the same time. It’s the worst feeling I’ve ever had. It has made me say things I didn’t really
mean, things that didn’t even come from my heart because down deep in my heart
I trusted you and I do to this very day.
And to think it all to come to this right on our anniversary before I
realized I was making a mountain out of a mole hill. Your letter today has brought me to my senses
and I want to tell you honestly and truly it seems like a big dream has come to
me. No, I’m not through with you Pheety! There’s no use trying to fool myself because
down deep in my heart I love you Margaret.
It has come to the point where our love is going to go one way or the
other just because I flew off the handle in a letter. Now a terrible feeling has come over
me and it’s torturing me as bad as it is you.
When I think of our happiness together and what a perfect pair we’ve
been, I know it will always be pressing me in my heart. Margaret there’s only one way out now. We’ve got to admitt
we’re still deeply in love with each other,
we’ve known that for a long time. It’s
been miserable being away from each other.
I realize it’s been plenty tough on you back there when I couldn’t write
you more. Look what it’s done to me when
you didn’t write often. And we
both worry about each other. Doesn’t all
this prove we need each other? I don’t
have to go into detail about our wonderful marriage,
you know how happy we were. You remember
every little thing we did together, It was wonderful wasn’t it Pheety. And you know
as well as I what’s going to happen when we see each other again. We’re going to run into each others arms, you
know we’re not just going to stand there and look at each other. Sure you were right, Darling, There will
be that old feeling when we see each other again, I can’t hide it from you this
time. Remember how it was when we met at
the station in
Margaret I realize the mistakes I
made earlier in our marriage which you mentioned in your letter. I realize a lot of thing now that I wish I
had a long time ago. I realize now that
I can’t mistreat and embarrass you anymore if I expect to hold you. Little was I aware just how much I was
hurting you but I’ve learned it now and I’ll never forget it. I realize now how much you loved me when you
put up with it. So I feel I’ve been very
fortunate to have one so wonderful as you for my
wife. I’m not making any excuses though,
I was wrong and it’s just one of those things in life I had to learn. Yes Pheety, I’m
mostly to blame for everything. There’s
only one thing I know of that you’re to blame for and that is neglecting
me. You realize now what it has done to
me to go week after week with no word from you.
That helped mostly to drive me to write that last terrible letter. Pheety I’m sure
you’ve learned as well as I have that we’ve just got to write each other more
often. As for you drinking I have only one thing to say, it isn’t going to make
me think anymore of you and it proves you had the time to write me more. I don’t expect you to stay home every night,
I want you to have a good time, but did you have to pick drinking as your pass
time. Maybe I did have something
to do with it, I’m not going to argue. But you know it isn’t right and if you have
any respect for yourself and your husband it’s not as bad as you put
it. I’m forgiving you anyway. You could be doing things a lot worse so I can’t
condemn you. I know you’ve been true to
me Darling and that is the main thing.
Well Margaret this is just one of
those things that comes in life where we have to learn. That’ all it is if you’ll just sit down and
think it over. Won’t you honestly
and truly agree that we have no reason to lose each other. You remember
how wonderful we got along before and after learning these mistakes don’t you
agree we’re going to live happier than ever before. You know we’ll be happy again because we were
before. We’re both suffering now because
we don’t want to lose the dearest thing we own and that is each other. I realize I could lose you as well as
you could lose me so is there any use to fight it longer when we know what’s
going to happen when we see each other again.
And another thing, Isn’t it true that we’re always wondering what the
other is doing when we go for weeks without hearing from each other? Margaret it’s evident we’ve got to get closer
together and write each other more.
Let’s not cause each other to worry anymore, I trust you Pheety more than you’ll ever know and you’ve got to trust
me the same. Don’t do things you’d be
ashamed to tell me like in your letter today, you know now that we can’t keep
things away from each other. You know when one tries to hide something that it
always leaks out in the end.
Well I’ve
learned a great lesson I will never forget Margaret and I’m taking most the
blame for everything. You’ve put things
before me in your letter today that I cannot deny. I’ve made a lot of mistakes and I want you to
forgive me. You made a big mistake by
neglecting me and I have forgiven you. I
went through a lot over here yet I know it’s been tough back there too. But I’ll be coming home in a few weeks and
you’ll be the first one to know it. I’ve
done all I can in this letter to try to convince you there is no use to make it
any harder for each other now. You’ll
have to agree that I’ve been very honest and sincere in this letter. Don’t you agree that everything I’ve said in
this letter is true? There’s only one
alternative and that is for us both to forget this ever happened. You’re all I have Pheety. I can’t let you go. Perhaps you’re disgusted after my last letter
but are you going to give it up now just because I learned I was wrong as well
as you were a little to blame too? All I
want to do now is make us a home and make you the proudest little wife in the
world. I’m flying home in a few weeks, are
you going to be there to meet me?
Margaret you know your mother isn’t
through with you, she’s just disgusted because you haven’t been coming
home. You’re her baby and you know she
loves you. Please for your mother and I
give up that job and go home to her. If
you won’t do that much for you mother and your husband then I will have given
up hopes for good. Your mother and I are
the two dearest friends you have. I want
you to notify your employer that your husband is returning home so he can
release you right away. Don’t worry
about that old job, it is nothing in our
life. I’m a Sergeant now and I’ll send
you enough money to get by on at home.
Enclosed please find $70.00, I’ll send more if I’m delayed in getting
home. You said you don’t feel hard
toward me so Darling I’m hoping you won’t turn me down this time. Don’t forget Pheety
your mother is going to live with us when I get home. Please go home and make her happy and get
ready for that wonderful homecoming. The
rail road men overhere are getting first priority on
redeployment to the States I suppose you’ve read Pres. Truman’s order to the
War Department to release the railroad men who are vitally needed back home on
the roads. The radio says we’re flying
home and just how soon they will get to our outfit I don’t know. I do know they want to get the railroaders
home as fast as transportation is available.
Margaret
there are some things you mentioned in your letter today that aren’t true and I
want to make them clear in you mind now and for good. You mentioned about some letters I sent you about
your Dad and Mom and your family.
Margaret you know I never said one thing against your mother or the
girls. And did I say anything about your
Dad except that I was worried about him expecting too much of you since your
operation. Now what else could I have
ever said about you family. It was just
that I was always looking after you Darling but I never dreamed I was hurting
you. Please forgive me as I honestly
meant no harm. Margaret
dearest I regret very much and am deeply sorry if some of my letters discussing
your Dad arrived home after his death.
Remember it was a long time after his death til
I recieved you letter telling me about him. At that time the mail was terribly slow, I
couldn’t help it if they arrived after he was gone. I don’t know what I could have said that was
so terrible but I realize it would sound worse now than before. I thought the world of your Dad Margaret and
you know it. I’ll never forgive myself
for not being with him more on my furlough.
He and I had some swell times together in the field with our wine and in
town. I always liked to be around your
Dad and Pheety I’m sure going to miss him when I come
home. Things aren’t going to be the same
without him.
Yes Darling
I have called you some dirty names and I only wish I could tell you how
I felt after I realized what I said. You
know how I flew off the handle when I got angry. You know very well I never meant any name I
called you, how could I when you’re the dearest thing I own.
You said
I’ve always considered myself better than you.
You don’t really mean that do you?
I never felt that way about it.
Since the very day you met me I think you have automatically felt
inferior to me for a reason I do not know.
Maybe you felt you were lucky to have me, I don’t know. I have noticed it for a long time and when
I’d talk about my family you got the impression I really thought I was better
than you. Margaret you are my wife
and if you ever think that I think I’m better than you, then
please tell me why I chose you to be my wife. Sometimes I think you’re out of your mind
when you say such things. I know I was
always speaking of my Dad, he has been a pal to us boys and my mother has been
swell to me too, but I never even dreamed I was giving you the impression that
I thought they were better than yours.
Things like that have never entered my mind, although you have made
remarks before but I didn’t think you meant it.
So I just let it go at that.
You’ve got me all wrong there Margaret and you’ve got to get that out
of your mind right now & forever! ¾
Margaret don’t
try to tell me that you’re no good anymore.
I know better than that. I’ve
lived with you and you were wonderful.
No woman could have treated me better than you have. It’s not that you’re no good anymore, it’s the environment around you. The good is still there. You just think you’re no good because you
know you’re doing something that isn’t right if you really are drinking so much
as you put it. You’ve taken the wrong
attitude Margaret. Maybe I’ve been gone
so long that you have begun to think there’s nothing to look forward to in our
life anymore. Maybe you’ve worried too
much and figured what’s the use. I know
it’s been tough being away from each other and it proves just how much we need
each other. If you really do have the
feeling that you’re no good anymore and have given up all hopes, then there’s
only one thing to do. Show me just how
much you care for me. You said it’s
tough to take knowing you care for me so much and can’t have me. I don’t have to tell you how you can keep
me and if you care for me that much then I know you’ll
do it. And that is to not get drunk
anymore and write me like a good little wife should. This is the first time in my life I’ve really
had a chance to show you just how much I love you. Please show me just how much you love me
Pheety. Get
away from that environment and go back home with your dear mother and wait for
your Pheety.
Remember it isn’t going to be long until I’ll be saying, “move over Pheety.”
I’ll close
now telling you that, “THERE CAN NEVER BE ANOTHER PHEETY”! Can there ever be another Dumplin? Do you still think no one can ever take my
place in your life? (please answer).
I love
you Pheety with all my heart & you know it! All my love and kisses to the dearest thing I
own.
Your Dumplin
X XXXX XXX!
“LET’S REMAIN SWEETHEARTS” PLEASE ANSWER MY LETTER
RIGHT AWAY PHEETY, I’LL FEEL SO MUCH BETTER WHEN I
HEAR FROM YOU AGAIN.