Co. C. 735th Ry. Opn. Bn.

A.P.O. #350  P.M. New York, N.Y.

July 28th, 2nd Wed. Anniv.

Ling, Austria

 

My Dearest Wife,

            Today is a day that will always live in my heart Pheety, yet it’s the saddest day I’ve ever had in my life because it’s our anniversary and I have broken your heart.  I just received your answer of July 11th, yes I asked for it and now it’s set me to thinking!  Not so much about your drinking, but because I realize I’ve made a great mistake.  It hurt me deep to write that letter and now you’re probably asking just why I did.  For one thing I’ve worried myself too much and when I’d go so long without hearing from you, I worried that much more.  My imagination began working on me.  Along came your letter March 6th where you made the remark that hurt me.  That set my imagination higher than a kite.  Then I wrote that long letter of April 27th full of imaginable things about the remark you made.  Later I got a letter from you but no answer about the remark.  Then I got angry because you ignored my question, I began to wonder why you didn’t want to answer it.  Finally my imagination got the best of me and I was so angry that it drove me to write that letter.  You’ll never know Margaret what it’s like to worry as I have & have your imagination working on you all the same time.  It’s the worst feeling I’ve ever had.  It has made me say things I didn’t really mean, things that didn’t even come from my heart because down deep in my heart I trusted you and I do to this very day.  And to think it all to come to this right on our anniversary before I realized I was making a mountain out of a mole hill.  Your letter today has brought me to my senses and I want to tell you honestly and truly it seems like a big dream has come to me.  No, I’m not through with you Pheety! There’s no use trying to fool myself because down deep in my heart I love you Margaret.  It has come to the point where our love is going to go one way or the other just because I flew off the handle in a letter.  Now a terrible feeling has come over me and it’s torturing me as bad as it is you.  When I think of our happiness together and what a perfect pair we’ve been, I know it will always be pressing me in my heart.  Margaret there’s only one way out now.  We’ve got to admitt we’re still deeply in love with each other, we’ve known that for a long time.  It’s been miserable being away from each other.  I realize it’s been plenty tough on you back there when I couldn’t write you more.  Look what it’s done to me when you didn’t write often.  And we both worry about each other.  Doesn’t all this prove we need each other?  I don’t have to go into detail about our wonderful marriage, you know how happy we were.  You remember every little thing we did together, It was wonderful wasn’t it Pheety.  And you know as well as I what’s going to happen when we see each other again.  We’re going to run into each others arms, you know we’re not just going to stand there and look at each other.  Sure you were right, Darling, There will be that old feeling when we see each other again, I can’t hide it from you this time.  Remember how it was when we met at the station in New Orleans.  Well what do you think it’s going to like when I come home.  It’s just going to be wonderful Darling.  We’ve got to admit from down deep in our hearts that all this is going to happen at first sight.

Margaret I realize the mistakes I made earlier in our marriage which you mentioned in your letter.  I realize a lot of thing now that I wish I had a long time ago.  I realize now that I can’t mistreat and embarrass you anymore if I expect to hold you.  Little was I aware just how much I was hurting you but I’ve learned it now and I’ll never forget it.  I realize now how much you loved me when you put up with it.  So I feel I’ve been very fortunate to have one so wonderful as you for my wife.  I’m not making any excuses though, I was wrong and it’s just one of those things in life I had to learn.  Yes Pheety, I’m mostly to blame for everything.  There’s only one thing I know of that you’re to blame for and that is neglecting me.  You realize now what it has done to me to go week after week with no word from you.  That helped mostly to drive me to write that last terrible letter.  Pheety I’m sure you’ve learned as well as I have that we’ve just got to write each other more often. As for you drinking I have only one thing to say, it isn’t going to make me think anymore of you and it proves you had the time to write me more.  I don’t expect you to stay home every night, I want you to have a good time, but did you have to pick drinking as your pass time.  Maybe I did have something to do with it, I’m not going to argue.  But you know it isn’t right and if you have any respect for yourself and your husband it’s not as bad as you put it.  I’m forgiving you anyway.  You could be doing things a lot worse so I can’t condemn you.  I know you’ve been true to me Darling and that is the main thing. 

Well Margaret this is just one of those things that comes in life where we have to learn.  That’ all it is if you’ll just sit down and think it over.  Won’t you honestly and truly agree that we have no reason to lose each other.  You remember how wonderful we got along before and after learning these mistakes don’t you agree we’re going to live happier than ever before.  You know we’ll be happy again because we were before.  We’re both suffering now because we don’t want to lose the dearest thing we own and that is each other.  I realize I could lose you as well as you could lose me so is there any use to fight it longer when we know what’s going to happen when we see each other again.  And another thing, Isn’t it true that we’re always wondering what the other is doing when we go for weeks without hearing from each other?  Margaret it’s evident we’ve got to get closer together and write each other more.  Let’s not cause each other to worry anymore, I trust you Pheety more than you’ll ever know and you’ve got to trust me the same.  Don’t do things you’d be ashamed to tell me like in your letter today, you know now that we can’t keep things away from each other. You know when one tries to hide something that it always leaks out in the end.

            Well I’ve learned a great lesson I will never forget Margaret and I’m taking most the blame for everything.  You’ve put things before me in your letter today that I cannot deny.  I’ve made a lot of mistakes and I want you to forgive me.  You made a big mistake by neglecting me and I have forgiven you.  I went through a lot over here yet I know it’s been tough back there too.  But I’ll be coming home in a few weeks and you’ll be the first one to know it.  I’ve done all I can in this letter to try to convince you there is no use to make it any harder for each other now.  You’ll have to agree that I’ve been very honest and sincere in this letter.  Don’t you agree that everything I’ve said in this letter is true?  There’s only one alternative and that is for us both to forget this ever happened.  You’re all I have Pheety.  I can’t let you go.  Perhaps you’re disgusted after my last letter but are you going to give it up now just because I learned I was wrong as well as you were a little to blame too?  All I want to do now is make us a home and make you the proudest little wife in the world.  I’m flying home in a few weeks, are you going to be there to meet me?

Margaret you know your mother isn’t through with you, she’s just disgusted because you haven’t been coming home.  You’re her baby and you know she loves you.  Please for your mother and I give up that job and go home to her.  If you won’t do that much for you mother and your husband then I will have given up hopes for good.  Your mother and I are the two dearest friends you have.  I want you to notify your employer that your husband is returning home so he can release you right away.  Don’t worry about that old job, it is nothing in our life.  I’m a Sergeant now and I’ll send you enough money to get by on at home.  Enclosed please find $70.00, I’ll send more if I’m delayed in getting home.  You said you don’t feel hard toward me so Darling I’m hoping you won’t turn me down this time.  Don’t forget Pheety your mother is going to live with us when I get home.  Please go home and make her happy and get ready for that wonderful homecoming.  The rail road men overhere are getting first priority on redeployment to the States I suppose you’ve read Pres. Truman’s order to the War Department to release the railroad men who are vitally needed back home on the roads.  The radio says we’re flying home and just how soon they will get to our outfit I don’t know.  I do know they want to get the railroaders home as fast as transportation is available.

            Margaret there are some things you mentioned in your letter today that aren’t true and I want to make them clear in you mind now and for good.  You mentioned about some letters I sent you about your Dad and Mom and your family.  Margaret you know I never said one thing against your mother or the girls.  And did I say anything about your Dad except that I was worried about him expecting too much of you since your operation.  Now what else could I have ever said about you family.  It was just that I was always looking after you Darling but I never dreamed I was hurting you.  Please forgive me as I honestly meant no harm.  Margaret dearest I regret very much and am deeply sorry if some of my letters discussing your Dad arrived home after his death.  Remember it was a long time after his death til I recieved you letter telling me about him.  At that time the mail was terribly slow, I couldn’t help it if they arrived after he was gone.  I don’t know what I could have said that was so terrible but I realize it would sound worse now than before.  I thought the world of your Dad Margaret and you know it.  I’ll never forgive myself for not being with him more on my furlough.  He and I had some swell times together in the field with our wine and in town.  I always liked to be around your Dad and Pheety I’m sure going to miss him when I come home.  Things aren’t going to be the same without him. 

            Yes Darling I have called you some dirty names and I only wish I could tell you how I felt after I realized what I said.  You know how I flew off the handle when I got angry.  You know very well I never meant any name I called you, how could I when you’re the dearest thing I own.

            You said I’ve always considered myself better than you.  You don’t really mean that do you?  I never felt that way about it.  Since the very day you met me I think you have automatically felt inferior to me for a reason I do not know.  Maybe you felt you were lucky to have me, I don’t know.  I have noticed it for a long time and when I’d talk about my family you got the impression I really thought I was better than you.  Margaret you are my wife and if you ever think that I think I’m better than you, then please tell me why I chose you to be my wife.  Sometimes I think you’re out of your mind when you say such things.  I know I was always speaking of my Dad, he has been a pal to us boys and my mother has been swell to me too, but I never even dreamed I was giving you the impression that I thought they were better than yours.  Things like that have never entered my mind, although you have made remarks before but I didn’t think you meant it.  So I just let it go at that.  You’ve got me all wrong there Margaret and you’ve got to get that out of your mind right now & forever! ¾

Margaret don’t try to tell me that you’re no good anymore.  I know better than that.  I’ve lived with you and you were wonderful.  No woman could have treated me better than you have.  It’s not that you’re no good anymore, it’s the environment around you.  The good is still there.  You just think you’re no good because you know you’re doing something that isn’t right if you really are drinking so much as you put it.  You’ve taken the wrong attitude Margaret.  Maybe I’ve been gone so long that you have begun to think there’s nothing to look forward to in our life anymore.  Maybe you’ve worried too much and figured what’s the use.  I know it’s been tough being away from each other and it proves just how much we need each other.  If you really do have the feeling that you’re no good anymore and have given up all hopes, then there’s only one thing to do.  Show me just how much you care for me.  You said it’s tough to take knowing you care for me so much and can’t have me.  I don’t have to tell you how you can keep me and if you care for me that much then I know you’ll do it.  And that is to not get drunk anymore and write me like a good little wife should.  This is the first time in my life I’ve really had a chance to show you just how much I love you.  Please show me just how much you love me Pheety.  Get away from that environment and go back home with your dear mother and wait for your Pheety.  Remember it isn’t going to be long until I’ll be saying, “move over Pheety.”

            I’ll close now telling you that, “THERE CAN NEVER BE ANOTHER PHEETY”!  Can there ever be another Dumplin?  Do you still think no one can ever take my place in your life?  (please answer).

            I love you Pheety with all my heart & you know it!  All my love and kisses to the dearest thing I own.

 

                                                                                    Your Dumplin

                                                                                    X   XXXX  XXX!

 

 

LET’S REMAIN SWEETHEARTS” PLEASE ANSWER MY LETTER RIGHT AWAY PHEETY, I’LL FEEL SO MUCH BETTER WHEN I HEAR FROM YOU AGAIN.